“Has the woman really arrived?” I often question myself. To step into a territory that was largely male dominated earlier is both, exciting and disturbing. It is more or less like tasting the forbidden fruit. The urge to work and achieve outside the four walls called ‘home’ most often tends to obliterate all limits. It also brings with it a period of trial and conflict. Discrimination, sexual harassment is only some of the tribulations that the modern woman faces for letting the seed of desire and ambition grow within her. So, has she committed a mistake by wanting to step into the big, bad world?

With the state of women being very much linked to the social set-up, the advancement or deterioration in their condition reflects very much on the society in which they live. And, considering the ‘fire’ raging within the system, confused signals trap women into the very rut that they are trying desperately to get out of.

Not just the immediate family and society, political forces in the name of protecting the culture of the nation, deprive women of the right to choose their options in life. She is reminded time and again of the enmity that has been
existing for ages between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law, stepmothers and stepdaughters etc, etc. For a woman, every other woman has to be a vamp, out to steal her husband, her son or her job! No wonder then, women themselves are confused about their position in society.

Way back, the woman was the silent spectator, giving birth and providing emotional strength to her children and husband. Now, she actively possesses her very own social set-up where she is in charge. This transformation is no surprise. Facilities not invented earlier and unavailable in the past are now accessible. The new woman is no longer content to be within the four walls of her home. Like the man she too rightfully wants a share of the universe.
Today, the woman is all charged up. She is in competition with men in professions that had until now been male domain. From jobs that demand the use of intellect like teaching, medicine, engineering and scientific research to physical tests of shooting, athletics, weightlifting, hockey, tennis and piloting. Consequently, all duties that accompany a family like parenting, household management and beliefs have undergone a drastic transformation. The modern woman has arrived. Has she, really?

Today, it is not just difficult but also unreasonable at times to expect a talented and ambitious woman to give up everything when she gets married. For better or for worse, many families today, tend to prefer a workingwoman in the family for that extra bit of income! Of course, there ARE women who do give up everything. Some
voluntarily, others forced. So, where does that leave feminism and equality? Contrary to claims, the immediate society still rules the thoughts and lives of the modern women.

So, is the woman content and happy today? Having played many a role in the human ring of stress and hypocrisy, is the woman content doing the balancing act? Is she satisfied with the way she is currently leading her life? There are many women today, longing to give more time to their family but are unable to do so because some of them mistakenly believe that in doing so they would immediately revert back to the Stone Age where the dominant male humiliated the female to exercise his superiority. So many women today, are in professions they are not interested in because they wish to exert authority or, they have strong desires to maintain a lifestyle that would raise their ‘status’ in society. They do not seem to be learning from the recurring errors of the men. In the meanwhile, there are women who work to survive.

Emotional bonds pull today’s woman in one direction while desires and ambitions tug her in another. In the process, she seems to be tripping on the very ropes that she is using to live her life. In spite of the great mountains that women have scaled they are still unable to protect themselves from rapists who cowardly run away scot-free, using muscle and political power. Most women ultimately end up doing COMPROMISES. We compromise on beliefs, we compromise on healthy living and we compromise on happiness.

I am not a pro working woman or an anti working woman. Sitting at home would be a foolish waste of precious talent and qualification. Nor should all women work just for the sake of some stereotype feminist stand. What I do suggest is that the women of today’s world pursue a middle path. The woman is born emotionally strong so she should make the right choices in life for herself, for her family and for the society at large. And this need not involve any kind of deal or compromise. What more can a person want in life? Life after all, is a game of survival and satisfaction. If the current means of survival by working outside does not make one feel good from inside then, it is time to be alert. And, strive for that little extra in life. Only then, would the women have really arrived!

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